I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize