quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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