What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
