Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
