The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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