Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
