I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
