Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
