Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize