Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
