she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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