Define "chronic" masturbator.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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