The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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