I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
