this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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