do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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