Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
