THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
