Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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