her vagine was all disorganized.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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