just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
