I think i sorta joined a cult last night
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
