And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
