my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
