with your own penis?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
The air was thick with penises
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
