Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Your cock deserves a montage
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I had to cum in my sink.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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