I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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