as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Randomize
