if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
