Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize