at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
