That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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