i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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