Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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