it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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