found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Let's get the cat blown out
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
