i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
the day after is always just damage control
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
