So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
