Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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