shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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