i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Will exercising make me less horny?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
