I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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