No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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