the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize