Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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