His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize