I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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