I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
