you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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