He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
