your thong is hanging out like whoa
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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